She needed to see the doctor again.
I couldn’t afford to take her…I couldn’t afford not to take her.
I had already spent money I didn’t have on her first visit.
Now, it was clear without another visit she might not make it.
I had to make a choice.
She would suffer if we didn’t go, I would suffer if we did.
Some would have said, “she’s just a cat”.
Cats are disposable like empty bottles…when they are finished you just get another one.
I don’t believe that.
I believe she was a gift from God…a companion given me to care for and be cared for by.
It wasn’t an easy decision, but a clear one.
When I chose her, I committed to do all I could for her well being.
We went to the doctor.
I paid the price.
The price wasn’t just financial.
I had to commit to constant attention and care.
She can’t move very well, so I carry her outside to use the facilities, then I carry her back…multiple times a day and in the middle of the night.
She sleeps on my bed and it causes her pain to jump off and walk to the food dish.
Therefore, she eats her meals in my bed.
She hates taking her medicine and thinks me cruel for forcing her to take it.
It pains me that she doesn’t understand I’m trying to heal her.
She is depressed over her condition and I try to comfort her as much as I can.
She is utterly dependent on me…and that depresses her too.
Sometimes, she seems to know that she is being loved and cared for…but not always.
I will be here for her, whether she understand my heart or not.
I’ve already made that commitment.
I know how she feels.
It’s been a long, hard, season of life.
I’m depressed over my condition.
I’m totally dependent on God…and that depresses me too.
Like Miss Kitty, I prefer making my own way.
Sometimes I understand that He loves and cares for me… sometimes I’m not so sure.
Sometimes, the medicine dispensed for the healing of my soul seems cruel.
His commitment isn’t dependent on how I feel.
He paid the price.
He paid with His life that I might live and in doing so committed to constant attention and care until He brings me home and for eternity after that.
He’s committed to you too.
You’re chosen and loved…even when you don’t understand.
You’re indispensable, not disposable.
He’s here, right now and always, for you.
And my cat.
Make your own application…