“There’s No Good Way To Leave A Cult”: The Potters Field Case

Pineapple Head says:

What a great (but sad) title for the article. So true!

Often that’s what keeps us in the madness…looking for a smooth way out when there is only jaggedness and pain.

Jessica says:

And refresh my memory Rozell started out under what church and what pastor?

Jessica says:

McClure is on PFM Facebook visiting Ignite in 2018 several times. Look CCA gets a 1/2 a point for writing the letter breaking away. Sadly why would they not research what is going on prior to people being victimized? CCA should have broken away immediately when contracts and kids are being used as slave labour. The damage is sadly done. If they don’t vett their affiliated ministries how do they check their own pastors? Not very good.

parts unknown says:

Great article, Michael. It should get more comments than it has so far…I hope at the very least you have a ton of readership.

Going strictly by what I’ve read here, there are similarities between PFM’s actions and what Ron Miscavage says he went through in escaping Scientology. Ron Miscavage is the father of current Scientology head David Miscavage and has written a book and done numerous interviews; I have not read the book (yet) but the interviews I heard were harrowing. Severe punishments, low pay, long back-breaking hours working for the church. The interviews are worth hunting down and listening to.

Another parallel is how Ron Miscavage discusses the Church of Scientology’s practice of recruiting actors and actresses within Hollywood who would project a positive image for the church within the mainstream world. Michael didn’t mention it here, but he has mentioned in another thread how the founders of PFM had a positive image and good reputation within the Calvary Chapel community.

TheGhostofBelleStarr says:

” The familiar tactics of shunning and demeaning come into play whenever people try to leave under less than ideal circumstances.
When one does leave, they are spoken ill of in the group as well to insure solidarity…those who left were “in sin” and rebellion against God.
Attempts to contact those who left were discouraged by the Rozells, even to say goodbye….”

Sounds like CC 101.
And its a shame that those who left, may in the future need a reference when they try to get involved at a new church ministry or apply for church membership. They sure can’t mention the time spent with Rozell as he will give them a bad rap, however unjustified. That’s why its very important this is made public.

pstrmike says:

TheGhostof…

Well said my friend. You are describing my experience when I left the CC that we attended together. Two of the other local CC’s that I looked into attending treated me as if I must have done something wrong. Even in the CC that we eventually landed in, I was viewed with a cloud of suspicion and I sat in the bullpen for a very long season.

TheGhostofBelleStarr says:

@pstrmike
That was for sure a steep part of the path during your journey to where the Lord has eventually brought you. Your perseverance has been blessed. He gave you a promise, He has kept it and He is keeping it :
” The Lord will perfect that which concerneth me. ..”

Daniel says:

I am from the Flathead Valley. My encounters with Mike Rozell have been limited to just 2. He appeared as a guest at our church once and just talked about himself while spinning some clay, and I saw him once at a subway restaurant, shouting at the poor sandwich maker over some miniscule thing. I have heard disturbing rumors about the Mudman burger operation for years, glad to see it in writing. I have been telling people not to support them but they always tell me the employees seem happy.

Will Whosoever says:

Without getting into specifics I can say that McClure is complicit in this as well. How do you not spend three+ years at PFM and not see or be able to ascertain the culture? Then on top of that, as a leader (an elder figure to Michael) you remain silent? Incredible, yes? I can share things regarding McClure and his own narcissistic ways. He will say that he did not witness any of this, but it is simply untrue and no, he did not confront Rozell until just before it went to the CCA board by his own recommendation. Wherever McClure is operating, he is needing to be the “Alpha Dog.” That’s all I can share publicly and it’s already too much. Christians…please pray.

Jeff says:

It’s about time.

Our family left 10 years ago and the place was whacked then. I served for six years and was part of the original team that created the first “school of discipleship”. It took 3 years before I really saw how jacked up it was. Once I moved into Sr Leadership, that’s when the true colors were shown. Three hour lectures over the phone, public shaming, fear mongering, and then the treats to keep you in. We got ski passes, international travel, dinners, rafting trips. Smacked around one day and a dozen roses the next…. text book abuser.

And to the guy I told to “run, not walk off the property” as they courted your family to join.
I told you so.

And to the pastor I spoke with months ago that discredited former employees and Don McClure dismissing our claims because you didn’t want to see the truth, shame on you.

victorious says:

On the other hand, any thing that who have heard good about Jean McClure. It’s true and probably even greater than what you have heard.

Anonymous says:

Just waiting for them to respond with “though none go with me” and declare this article as persecution. Glad truth is being brought to light.

Dan says:

I really appreciate all the digging you have done on this issue. Do you have any current plans of bringing this story to a wider audience? I mean not to disparage your website, but I only managed to stumble upon this due to having an associate who used to be involved with the whole mudmen business. There are ALOT of people in the valley who are not particularly concerned about spiritual matters, but are very concerned about having a cult in their backyard and the worker exploitation that happens at mudmen. We have heard rumors for years but I would love to see the claims substantiated. Would any of the local news organizations (E.G the Beacon, MTPR, Daily Interlake) be willing to run this story? Would you be willing to share sources with them. I know people who unfortunately will not believe blog posts but will believe what they see in the paper, I would really like them to read your story.

Steve says:

……it took one feisty, brave, McClure to stand up and shout the truth where it could make a difference…..
________________________________

Michael, so removing PFM from their affiliated ministries and releasing a statement saying that their discipleship methods are not what Chuck Smith modeled is being fiesty and brave? Isn’t that actually lying and distorting history and putting this at their idol Chuck Smith and whitewashing the origins of this crap.

Jeff says:

As a team member of the original staff who moved from Fort Lauderdale in 2003 to begin this awesome endeavor of developing a radical, out-of-the-box, School of discipleship, I feel the need to comment once again.

There were warning signs even before we moved our family. This issue of control and rage was known by the staff at CC Fort Lauderdale for many years before Potter’s field Ranch was even a thought.

The thrust of my comment here is twofold, ultimately there are sins of the domineering Shepherds and there are sins of the complicit sheep. Throwing mud at Don will do no good. There were many who saw things and did not know how to expose for the various reasons that only one involved can understand. For those of you who are not intimately involved with this ministry I do implore you to tread lightly on judgment. These are very emotionally, mentally, spiritually charged complicated dealings.

In light of the above comment from Sarah, I too must admit that God used the six years in my life to develop me into a person who has learned to bear more weight, fulfill my obligations, and was the bedrock of shaping me into the successful person I am today. There was much fruit through all of these years of ministry, this alone is the testimony that God is the faithful one who uses jackasses all over the world.

For any out there who have used the negative influence of this ministry as a breaking-point in your relationship with your heavenly Father, I am saddened by that and will encourage you to look beyond the brokenness of men. Church history is one long story of God’s faithfulness to use jacked up humans to propagate the good news that God wants to save sinners and will through many means continue to do so.

For those of you seeking to point fingers and need a place to aim your hurt, as a 20-year ministry veteran of five different Christian organizations; other than the key leader himself, the blame ultimately lies on the board members throughout the years. They are the ones who knew the most, saw the most, and heard the direct reports from those on staff. Why they did nothing or why what they did to expose this never took root, only God knows. But I watched several board members turn a blind eye to the verbal abuse and emotional destruction coming from the top. I offer that only as a factual statement with no malice in my heart and no stone-throwing. Several of these men I know personally and care about.

God have mercy on us all, we are only human.

Jessica says:

And the wagons have started to circle.

Jessica says:

Jeff and Nolongerashamed, thank you for sharing. I have had 19+ kids who at one time or another had the desire to give it all to God and go off to work in mission ministry. We actually have read a lot of the blogs from students out of this program and were amazed and respect their servicing. My kids have been in much smaller, but “navy seal” type marketed ministries for high school that pushed the limits, however as parents we knew everything prior. We could contact the pastor anytime and by knowing the program we were able to speak
With our children about their experience when they came back. It was marketed as a character building, push the limits, break you, life changing experience appropriate for high schoolers kind of like reality TV Survivor camps and overseen by older peers. I think it is very very important that the variables/gaps that led to this abuse and possible cult which IMO a cult is a planned concept not mistakes in a ministry be transparent and told by you, your families and staff so other Christian youth and family can be proactive in not falling prey. So thank you for sharing. I do not agree with making excuses for Rozell temper or trying to balance these stories reported with, he meant well, it served a purpose in the world, it built me up to be stronger, he is a gifted speaker and lastly God uses sinners. The ministry, board of director and founder needs to be accountable and thank you for having the courage to speak out. Lastly still blown away w the fact so many had no idea like pastors frm cc whose kids went through the program and ex pastor families. You would think they would be the first to see red flags.

Steve says:

Midwife Patti,

Thank you for your story. I’m so greatful to hear from survivors. There is hope outside the cult. I’ll also make that statement a bit broader as well in stating there is hope outside of CC. I once tried to determine if CC was a cult or not. I never came to a conclusion affirmatively other than cult like tactics have been used in CC over and over again and to not recognize that puts our children at risk.

Steve says:

Michael,. Thank you for the clarification about Don McClure’ grand daughter. You did a great job with the article. When you mentioned McClure I immediately assumed it was Don which was my bad. Don’s grand daughter wasnt really mentioned in the main article which led me to a premature conclusion.

Steve says:

Jacob,. It’s definitely a cult! Yet the Rozells and many CC pastor’s only joke about drinking the Kool-aide convincing themselves they couldn’t possibly be drinking it yet they were the ones that had the keg of this Kool-aide for years serving it to the most vulnerable. I had concerns with PFM with their courses on vision casting I researched on their web site and only now I am seeing the fruit of this. I guess when you are drinking it, you get intoxicated by it’s seductive power to manipulate. Material success followed by a trail of broken souls that are too easily forgotten.

DawnMarie says:

As someone who got out over 7 years ago, I just want to say Thank you to everyone for speaking up here. This article and every comment is an answer to prayer. The lies and pain needs to stop, so healing can begin.

Julie Anne says:

It seem Calvary Chapel sets itself up for abusers in the pulpit because of the adherence to the Moses Model authority structure.

Reading this reminded me much of my own cult experience. There is no doubt in my mind this group is functioning as a cult. I hope those who have left will heal from this spiritual, emotional, and physical abuse. My heart goes out to them.

Ron Smith says:

Couple questions 1. Did you ever talk to Mike and Pam. 2. How many people that are still part of the ministry have you interviewed compared to the one’s who left?

Lastly I was involved in something that was reported to CCA a few years ago that sounds like what you’re reporting but that Pastor is still running a church. Can you help by interviewing all who left and stayed to come to a fair decision. This Pastor did all Mike is accused of but nobody ever talked to people who left. The church is in Utah

Anon says:

Just Wow-

The man has been confronted many times. He has straight up fired & shut out people for suggesting that he seek accountability and counseling. We can only pray and hope he will do the right thing, but we are talking about a narcissist with a god-complex that has rejected truth time and time and time again. He doesn’t think he needs help. In his mind, if you disagree with him, you’re disagreeing with God.

R says:

You didn’t answer my first question.

Kal says:

My wife was physicality and emotionally abused by Mike. She still serves Jesus in spite of her terror of this false prophet.
#pfmsurvivors

R says:

The biblical term would be shepherd. Zookeepers make sure their animals stay in their cages.

victorious says:

R-
You have learned some accurate lingo but have also been taught and adopted a false cowardly methodology that accompanies the hubris of mind you have put on display.

Your version of a shepherd is one who cares about the public relations spin of the spiritual platform while letting the wolf eat sheep; all in the name of your notion of love.

Jesus made it clear such people were not shepherds but hirelings who flee from ( while quoting voluminous scripture ) rather than fight the wolves as trauma is inflicted upon others. That mindset has run rampant across multiple generations.

Steve says:

It seem Calvary Chapel sets itself up for abusers in the pulpit because of the adherence to the Moses Model authority structure.
______________________________________________________________________

Julie Anne, yep and I’m calling for every single Moses model pastor in CC from the no name to the big and powerful to step down from ministry and understand how complicit they have been in the abuse of so many for so long. I don’t have visions of God speaking to me like they apparently do, but I’ve also never felt more prophetic in calling for their repentance of every single one of them.

The New Victor says:

“Even if the truth was shared from someone who disagrees with the accusations, would those be shared? In a court of law there’s always two sides presented. It seems like there’s only been one side that you’ve posted about.”

Five years ago, I had to call the cops on my ex-BIL, my kids teenage uncle, whom I loved. The first time my 2 year old daughter told me “Uncle [name] touched my butt!” I was confused. I think she meant her genitals. I made it a point to spend more time with him on joint outings with the kids. My son had just turned 5.

The second time she said it, just turned 3, and her genitals were red which I had attributed to diaper rash, I knew I had to do something. I knew the ex-laws had a history of hiding past domestic abuse, so I left my ex out of it and took it upon myself what I knew would happen.

They hated me. Accused me of being the abuser and lying to protect myself (that makes no sense, but I understood the emotions). After getting over the shock of not telling her, their mom did the right thing and… sided with me? No. Sided with our daughter because then D (just turned 3) told her the same thing. The afternoon I made the report, standing at a window downtown for 3 hours (it wasn’t like Barney Miller where I was sitting at a desk), 6 cops showed up and arrested the 17 year old uncle, separated the family and interviewed everybody there. Our kids told the cops differently than they told me (then S5 confirmed what his sister told me), and the uncle was released.

A child rape exam (and it kills me that such places exist), turned up no DNA evidence, and a partially broken hymen, which sometimes is natural. Criminal case closed.

My ex later told me that [had to stop for a minute… surprise tears as I revisit this again] both kids told their mom that “[uncle] touched our butts” months before I heard it. Even if it was just their backsides, she and grandma should have enacted rules and boundaries. Instead, she called her grandchildren liars and said that her son would never do that! So both moms became complicit accessories to possible child sexual abuse.

There was also a cultural component, I was told I should have gone to the Patriarch (Pastor? Moses?). I violated the Cultural Code. Yet since he was the former domestic abuser as serial adulterer, yeah, right!

If I fail to provide for my family (pretty sure providing includes protecting), then I’m worse than the unbelievers. Pretty sure The Good Book says so.

After boundaries were enacted, sufficient to satisfy CPS, a year later, D locked the bathroom at grandmas house. She asked why. “To protect me from Uncle!” Grandma called her a liar and wanted to have alone time to talk to her. Thankfully, my ex said NO, and since then, D is never there for more than a few hours or with me, her mom, or her aunt (who had moved back from out of state with her young son).

The Natcissistic Family Unit adjusts to protect itself from outside conflict which can upset its [dysfinctional] balance. Sure, the Family Unit remains strong, *at the expense of sacrificing individuals upon the alter of Family*.

As supreme court justice Louis Brandeis once wrote, “Sunlight is said to be the best of disinfectants; electric light the most efficient policeman.” A therapist likened it to shining a flashlight, and suddenly people behave.

This isn’t about “a court of law” but about protecting those who cannot protect themselves. Those who are in positions to do so, FAIL if things are hidden, because what is hidden will be exposed, hopefully in this life rather than the next.

Ren says:

In the summer of 2011, our family sold/gave away/packed our belongings, sold one car, and drove the other across the country to Montana for 3 months of ‘training’ before becoming long term missionaries in Central America for PFM.
Red flags appeared early for me:
no plans for language training
(“You’ll pick it up when you get there!”),
repeated urging to sell instead of rent out our home (“It means you’re really all in.”) and
scheduling my husband only for classes to ‘prep for the field’ when clearly we were moving there together for the first time with our two young boys. For some reason, there was a constant emphasis on speed rather than quality of preparation.
I’m thankful for the Holy Spirit (and the stubbornness God gave me to listen to Him over all.) I quickly registered and took Spanish 102 to get some language learning started at our local community college before we left our home. I disagreed repeatedly with selling our home (never heard any talk/planning about what we would do when the time came to re-enter the US.) I am thankful to this day; when we returned after 4 years, we didn’t have jobs or cars or…forks, but man, we had our home. It was empty, but God’s beautiful math had it grow in great value while we were gone. And, it’s funny… so many people in our home church cheered and encouraged us on the way out, while only a very few help us quietly rebuild an existence when we returned.
Uneasy memories include a very strange meeting with Mike, his 2nd in command and my husband and I where I was warned that:
“Central America is a patriarchal society.” (I know.) “And it’s not good to be a ‘strong woman’ there; they wouldn’t like/accept it.” (Ok…uh, have I done something wrong?) “No, no…we just wanted to make sure you know this.” (Walking away with my husband as confused as I was, then saying to him, “If you ask me, it takes a strong woman to pack up her family’s everything, move to a foreign country, and work with orphans. Would you want a weak woman?”)
In the midst of much confusion and being constantly referred to as ‘guinea pigs’ because we became the first of the brand new Ignite classes, there was a visit by Mike and co-pastors/leaders. We were asked how it’s going with the 5 interns they sent us, one week after we arrived, as rains brought flooding and evacuation due to landslides. As we tried to relay the several hurdles and how we were learning to work together through them, Mike began screaming at us in a hotel lobby from midnight to 2 AM. “THIS IS WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR! I’LL PUT YOU ON A PLANE BACK TO THE STATES SO FAST YOU WONT BELIEVE IT! HOW DARE YOU BRING UP THESE TRIVIAL THINGS! WE’RE HERE TO KICK IN THE GATES OF HELL!” It was especially unnerving to have three other pastors sit/stand there watching this mantrum with mixed looks of understanding, pity, and acceptance.
The last straw included a phone call about how to best get a children’s program going in the new location we were moved to in Guatemala. I relayed that the local pastor often changed his mind as to how, when, and what the program would be. I was told by Mike’s #2 leader:
“Just pretend like the pastor’s in charge in meetings but, at the end of the day, we’re paying the bills so we know who’s really in charge.”
After staring at the phone incredulously, I said, “You mean, the pastor IS in charge, right?” (This is the model we had been taught repeatedly during our 3 months of ‘training’ for the field, after they let me join the classes.)
He replied, “Right, pretend like he’s in charge.”
I felt nauseous. I was done. I literally don’t know how to do it like this (and refuse to represent the Lord in this way.) We knew it was time to do different things differently. Soon after, my husband began building houses with another local ministry, and I began building boxes full of play equipment for those who work with children.
We returned to the States in the summer of 2015. Trust, that used to flow naturally, has become a challenge in many areas of life now, especially for those in leadership & authority positions. Depression and anxiety has manifested in different ways in different members of our family. Four years after returning to the States, we continue to work through the messy heaviness.
Thank you, Michael. For carefully listening, righteously reporting, and for helping connect all of us who knew ‘SOME THING’S NOT RIGHT HERE’ so we can expose this to the light and begin/continue healing. I hope and pray that all of us can continue to grow in our relationships with the Lord, not because of PFM, but in spite of them.
PS. I want to acknowledge that while our experiences felt betraying and difficult, I am appalled to read all that went on for young interns. I stand with you and am here to help however possible.

Just being honest says:

I was an intern with PFM and enjoyed the friends I made and time spent there. However, yes, it’s a cult. Mike yelled at our class often for hours on end, and he mentioned how often, nights before he would have to give his performances, he would get extreme panic attacks, and he felt it was Satan trying to get him to stop. In the moment, I thought… “maybe that’s God saying you need to just stop and refocus on Him…”. He also told our class he was a prophet. And once when I asked about his daily Bible reading and prayer time, he didn’t have a clear answer. And one of the girls on staff, from his “inner circle,” bragged how Mike told her, “when we go out to eat, don’t think you ever have to worry about money, we are going to nice places” (or something of that nature, please don’t quote me!!! I just remember thinking it was really odd)

But anyways, like I said, I did enjoy my time meeting new friends, but I couldn’t imagine being there long term. God pulled me out of there, thank God!!!

Jessica says:

Roxann, My heart goes out to you and your family. Chet Lowe is frm CCftl And had a youth based ministry called Patmos location ws the Bahamas. Is this the same Chet? You also know Rozell started his ministry frm CCftl. I wonder how these ministries are invented? Looking back they were made for youth and usually based for kids who needed focus away from the secular world or wanted to give back in a mission form. Hearing of these tragic outcomes we all now must wonder, how secure and stable they really are? Thank you for sharing.

Kenzie Kinney says:

The “ministry” was founded by and is being run by a cruel, manipulative, intelligent, and evil man who is responsible for hundreds of young adults with PTSD, years of therapy, depression, and suicides.

I was a part of it for years so I know better than anyone how easy it is to be brainwashed like this….this isn’t just some article I decided to share without fact checking. I was a part of this firsthand and am still suffering from it’s effects. They prey on vulnerable young people on purpose. I was lucky enough to escape, however, some very dear friends of mine have not been as fortunate. Please be sensitive and do not use phrases like “well why don’t they just leave? It’s not like they’re handcuffed there or anything” and “it must not be that bad then”. Those are ignorant statements and you obviously have been fortunate enough to not have been involved in abusive hostage situations like this.

If I can also speak to one thing and she’s some light regarding Pastor Don McClure:
Every time he visited, Mike made SURE she was with him 100% of the time to ensure all of what he saw and heard was being monitored so he would never know about anything unsavory. It’s very easy to pass off as just plain hospitable. He was only being shown the facades of what Mike wanted him to see so it looked like this amazing program. Made sure no one would accidentally slip up and say something that could show any red flags. Facilitated every activity and conversation, every move was very intentional.

Don McClure is just a man like everyone else, and he was manipulated just as severely as the rest of us. I can attest to the guilt and shame he is suffering from, as he saw me at the coffee shop I was working at and began sobbing, apologizing for being such a fool, asking how God could ever forgive him. He was not only ashamed for being so blind, but for blatantly encouraging and pushing PFM so heavily. He is sickened and heartbroken, so to all who are very quick to judge him, please remember he is a man who loves the Lord and was blindsided like the rest of the world.

Steve says:

Don McClure I believe Kenzi and I take her word your heart is broken. You are not in a position to fix this mess. The only way is to lead by example and step down from any and all authority in ministry for a long time. Someone that has been deceived like this should not be on any ministry board for your sake and the sake of others. If you care to listen, when I came to you in 2012 about a similar situation you ignored me. Remember you are the one that wrote the forward to Rozells book if that says anything at all. Truly repent and let God set you free. BTW, you have taken the first step in repentance and I applaud you for that God bless

Brooke Garza says:

I served with PFM in Ignite in 2015. I have just published my experience in this blog post because it was too much to share in the comments here. Thank you so much to the interns that were the first to come forward. I regret that I wasn’t amongst you. Thank you, Phoenix Preacher, for your investigation, report, and fairness. God is faithful to us all.

https://illuminatedbytheson.blogspot.com/2019/07/the-raw-truth-of-my-experience-in-ignite.html?m=1

Michaela Griffin says:

My heart is completely broken as I read this article, read the comments…. think back to my own time in the program. The only thing I can say very clearly is that it’s a very confusing time for me as well as the other interns I know and love. Please be gracious to us as we process all of this.

I did ignite in 2015, part of class 8. There were two instances I can think of very clearly where pastor mike lost his temper with us. The first time was a couple nights into us arriving in Guatemala for our training. He sat the whole group down in the kitchen and started ripping into us, demanding to know who has gossiped already about someone else we just met, and told stories about how gossip made the past classes bad. He demanded to know who had already gossiped… declaring that anyone who has gossiped already would be sent home immediately. They weren’t fit for what we were there for. While we sat there in terror looking around, one of my classmates (who has actually commented here already) raised her hand and admitted to gossip, accepting that meant she was going home. I remember thinking she was brave to be so honest. She never got sent home but the lecture continued.

The second time I remember clearly was in our ReEntry period in Montana. We were downstairs in the church Selah and I could see Mike screaming at two classmates in the corner (one of them being the same girl from the previous story). Both girls were crying. I couldn’t tell you about what, I was so scared I pretended it wasn’t happening. Part of the secrecy and “don’t ask, don’t tell” motto that he had engrained into me already. When he was done with them he got all of us together and screamed about how people go home from the program and don’t sponsor the ministry. He told us they obviously don’t love the children they had all just poured into, and that a lot of them don’t even walk with the Lord anymore. He then demanded that we make a vow to support the ministry when we get home. If we would publicly accept we could have the “Stay Tucked” bracelets he had made for our class. I had supported PFM financially since I was 16… pastor mike spent a lot of time at my church CC Boston. Him and Pastor Randy were good friends. I grabbed my bracelet relieved that I wouldn’t be shamed by not having one. At the time it seemed wrong but what could I do about it…

My experience there was very bad but mostly because my uncle died half way through the program and I had to go home for 3 weeks. I thought I was having an extra hard time because I went right back after (duty calls. Lots of people donated lots of money to send me there, I can’t let them down) and was grieving in a strange place with people I had just met. I assumed everyone else had a better experience than I did.

Pastor Mike really liked me. When he visited us in Kenya it was right after I returned and I was so starving for affection that I sat at his feet on his side of the house and listened to anything the group would talk about. The leadership traveling with him even asked if it was okay I was there and he gladly let me stay. I could be trusted with what I heard.

Up until a couple months ago when I was contacted by fellow interns and told horror stories I would have fought to defend Pastor Mike with everything I have. I considered him my pastor, especially after the awful things I experienced at my own CC when I returned home. Processing this has been very difficult for me.

I know this is a long response and I apologize, but this will be my final story. August 2018 I returned to Montana for a 3 day visit. Many of my friends were there as 2.0’s (graduated interns that return to Montana to live there and serve). I reached out to staff to ask if I could come visit and was met with excitement. I almost didn’t go but at the last minute booked my ticket. I was told I wouldn’t have to get a hotel or bnb, I could stay at one of the houses for free. If I really wanted I could donate something but I didn’t have to. They picked me up from the airport and for the next 3 days I was questioned and looked at with confusion. A very different response than what I got online. I was asked “why are you here?” So many times I lost count and started to really ask myself the same thing. Apparently you’re not allowed to go there to “just visit”. I felt more uncomfortable with every interaction I faced and didn’t see pastor mike until an hour or so before I was headed back to the airport. While staying at one 2.0’s house, I was talking to her when she started really prying about sin in my life. Deep conversations are normal in the program so I didn’t think anything of it at first, but then she asked me point blank if I masturbate, if I use toys, if I’m sexually attracted to women. She continued this until she felt I had given her an honest answer. Feeling guilty, I asked to go to my room to pray privately about the matter and was told I could not. I had to pray and confess my sins publicly and she wasn’t satisfied that I was truly repentant until I started crying. She even told me that if I wasn’t repentant she would have to throw me out like the story in 1 Cor 5 of the man caught sleeping with his fathers wife. They were providing my transportation and housing, so I was mortified. I couldn’t imagine being stranded in Montana. She then called another 2.0 who was a classmate of mine and asked her to drive from the office to her house to be with me while I prayed. After all of that was done, another newer 2.0 came home and she then told her what had just happened with me. I was humiliated, and too ashamed to talk to even my best friend about it who was living there at the time. Apparently I was told it is a talk all of the girls have gotten.

Reading your article Michael the stories of this happening to other people hit me the deepest because up until that happened I was writing off everything else as just normal ministry stuff. The “miscommunication” of living with people from different cultures. Thank you for bringing this to light, because I’ve known about some awful stories for months and have been so afraid for the people I love who are still in ministry there. Those interns have good hearts and they honestly believe this is what God wants. Please, everyone pray for them, this is a very messy confusing time for us.

Midwife says:

Brooke Garza,

Brooke, Your story shook me to my core. I understand this brutal abuse by a church “pastor” as I was severely thrown out of a church in 1971 simply because he couldn’t use me. This also separated me from my boyfriend of two years, someone I dearly loved and looked forward to marrying. I’m reading everyone’s stories because you deserve my attention and my prayers for your healing. I am now in my middle 60s and I remember the abuse like it happened yesterday. I never really had a chance to share my story and no one ever told me how wrong and totally unbiblical the treatment I got was. So I’ve always held on to a piece of it like wearing a scarlet letter. God, Jesus our Lord is becoming clearer to me every day as a completely loving and healing Father. I’m to a point where I am seriously rebuking any thoughts or memories as so wrong and just not my problem any more. They are the guilty ones, the evil ones, the proud ones, the ones whose deeds we now can smell when they are watched on a video or walk into a room. I can feel the expressions on this Mike’s face when he’s spitting out his filth towards you and others in your story. Ohhhh how God will deal with them… Now, as a Great Grandmother, I would not hesitate to put him in his place as a miserable, terrible and abusive character if I had the opportunity. Yes, God will take him down and all the other men who paint themselves as pastors when we now know they are very ugly wolves in pastor clothing. His Birkenstock’s don’t fool me nor his man-handling of the innocent clay he punches and grips like he does with young people. He’s a bully and a coward. I am praying for you to see the kindness of God in your life. I am praying for you to understand the affirmations God wants to give you for being such a beautiful child of His. Even in your darkest moments, Jesus, I believe cries for you to know His love and that He is not angry with you. I trust Him for these understandings in your life as I have in my own. God is on the move and these bad bad men and women will see Him coming for them! Thank you for sharing your tragic story. I’m so sorry that any young woman or man had to go through this decades after I went through mine. Your story helps me to continue to heal too. Patti

Jeff says:

Dear R, and any others who have opinions about our comments who have not attended the school or been on staff:

Please be quiet. Please do not try and spin some Bible verses about how this “should be handled”.

I helped start this school in 2003 and was finally “fired” in 2008. I am the one who started the intern program. I was there when we wrote the curriculum for the very first class, and I took over the school as the Dean of Potter’s Field Ranch in 2005 after the first mass exodus of staff members. I was there when we first went international with the orphanage in El Salvador, and I was there when Mike had his epiphany moment that he and Pam had helped support World Vision upwards of 20 Million dollars over the years via sponsorships – concluding that they should start their own sponsorship and retain all that money.

If you were not there than you do not know what we went through and who got hurt and how they got hurt. This is so long overdue.

I’m sickened and saddened at how this behavior only escalated, and I’m utterly disgusted by the pastors and leaders who discredit and dismiss any of these testimonies. Shame on all who knew better, who smelled something foul over the years, and those us who kept drinking the kool-aid.

It was never meant to be this way. Please forgive me for any part I had to play.

For those of you who enjoyed your time, who made it through unscathed, praise God! He is faithful despite our own stupidity!

Jeff Bower
s.w.jefferey@gmail.com

Jessica says:

We will continue to pray for each and everyone of you and your families. You all are brave and are helping so many w your testimonies. Thank you Michael for advocating through Phoenix Preacher for these amazing brave young disciples to speak their hearts and these truths. Acts 4:24, 29-30 This needs to be heard and stopped.

tilthewholeworldhearsyoureacult says:

I’ve witnessed and experienced this abuse from Mike AND Pam firsthand. Although it is easy to overlook Pam because of her husband’s “radical” behaviour, she is every bit as responsible as Mike.
Praying for those still involved at PFM as they endure the “punishment” sure to come.
I have local friends and family willing to help those that need to evacuate. Please contact Michael via e-mail and he will give you my contact.

JM says:

I am still processing and formulating the words to articulate my experiences. What I will say for now is that 8 years later, I finally know that I am not alone, and I will never be able to truly articulate what that feels like. I am so thankful for this platform and that truth is being brought to light.

UnCCed says:

And for those involved with CCs just the past few years, and a reminder to those of us with decades of experience, remember the decades of ridicule Chuck and his parrots (little Moses) heaped upon a lot of other ministries (I still have the C series CDs teachings) where he’d point out their flaws and “beating the sheep” as proof they weren’t as “anointed” as CCs.
Ok CCs, now take your medicine!!!
I’m up to about 16+ news stories of these narcissists produced from YOUR movement, convicted of the most foul behavior (felonies).
Where the ridicule for you?!!!
“Cemeteries” produced academics “lacking faith?”
I know of a couple fine seminaries (couldn’t attend any) who didn’t teach the pastor to dupe a vulnerable mother into polygamy, then kill her!
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nwfdailynews.com/article/20160428/NEWS/160428849%3Ftemplate%3Dampart

J says:

I was an “intern” in 2007 and became staff in 2008. I was paid $150 for +50 hours of work per week as an intern, and I made $900 per month as a staff member. I was working upwards of 15-hour days including working with students, for which I was not trained or prepared for.

My time at the Ranch is similar to most people as a student. You run laps in the snow, hike mountains, get woken up in the middle of the night to switch dorms, work out until you throw up, berated by staff and/or Pastor Michael. You are reminded that you are insignificant and that Pastor Michael is a true vessel of God. Here’s what I wrote in my journal. This is just one conversation with Mike Rozell while I was still a student.

May 3rd, 2007
“Today Pastor Mike came and told us the visions (our plans for how we would serve God after leaving the Ranch) weren’t big enough… Afterwards, I talked to him and…[sorry, I’m parsing this down for clarity but the parts I’m typing out are word for word] he said, “You guys aren’t a team yet and none of us can figure out why.” He said it then aloud to everyone in the room and left.

“After lunch, he came to ___ and I and brought up the fact that after he had left the room, someone said, “I think we are a group,” and it undermined Pastor Mike. Pastor Mike said God has given PFR to him. He’s seen 8 teams come through–enough to see the difference between those that are unified and those that aren’t. He said we aren’t a team because we all think we still have rights. We think we have the right to say that we believe the authority set above us is wrong. But if it [the leadership structure] goes: God, Pastor Mike, Pastor J and Pastor D, then the rest of the staff, what makes us think we have the right to be the one that’s right?

“God gave Pastor Mike all the rights and his staff does whatever he asks without asking why or telling him what they think he should really do because they all know that they were called to serve there and doing that means having respect for Pastor Mike. He said that we’re wasting near half a million dollars by not being a team because that’s what we’re called here to be, so we’re missing out on the blessings. He said we would be accountable to God for the $13,000 that was paid for us to be here and to use it wisely, fix the problem, and grow. Pastor Mike said that he was crucified by us right here on his own property because of criticism. He asked me if I was all in and I said I was.”

Things got worse when I came on staff. I don’t have the energy to really get into all of it now, but it was pretty traumatic. Pastor Michael would ignore me then get really personal. He asked me to move to El Salvador to work at the orphanage there with another pastor and his family and then told me no. It became a theme, him telling me one thing then taking it back.

When things got really bad, he would lecture me while I sobbed and tell me I had to leave the Ranch, then the next day he would take it back and say God told him I needed to stay. He did this a few times. He let me get treated like an animal in a cage by other staff and board members, all while saying it was because God wanted me to be there.

I am not ready to share my story as it would take away my anonymity, but I am grateful to the survivors who feel comfortable sharing their truth. Thank you for shedding light on Potter’s Field.

Walking in Truth says:

“Good Leadership requires you to surround yourself with people of diverse perspectives who can disagree with you without fear of retaliation”

Still Standing says:

Sadly, this important warning will not be heeded by the people that need to see it most, the kids that are currently there.
I know how this works. I’m willing to wager that the young people there are either on a “tech fast”
Or, there’s an outright ban on social media altogether in order to maintain control over any and all outside influence.
Undoubtedly, the leadership is reading it, though. To you, I say, shame on you. You profess to know God’s word, yet you distort it. Jesus would NEVER “turn over tables” on His people. Only those who would use and take advantage of them, flaunt their power and take nothing less than the “ high seats.” Show me ONE scripture of our Lord screaming in peoples faces. One! You won’t find it, because it’s not there. You expect perfection at being faithful in the small things, and don’t even have governance over your own emotions. Get your house in order. It’s a mess.

Debra J Gerold says:

I would like to spoeak to the writer of this article. My granddaughter is part of the Ministry in Montana. I have some questions.
Thank you
Debbie

Erunner says:

I couldn’t help but think of Scientology as I read the article and many comments. Makes this even more chilling to me.

Nathan says:

What happens if mike and Pam step down and out but the rest of his leadership stay and are the ones who take over they have been trained and discipled to be like him?

BrianD says:

To all of those who have suffered under this “ministry”: you are not alone. For those who are still underneath its oppressive yoke, please know that you have a world of support waiting for you. For those who have escaped and are speaking out, know you are loved and there are many who have your back, will not mistreat you and are willing to help you and walk with you back into freedom.

To Erunner: I made the same connection, too, based on what I’ve read here and what I heard from interviews and read in books by former Scientologists.

Leah Remini said on Joe Rogan’s podcast* that her TV show’s producers had received requests to look into other cults. I wonder if they might be interested in looking at PFM?

* Remini, an actress who escaped Scientology, hosted a TV show breaking down that religion. The interview referenced does have language, and does go into some detail in her experiences inside and escaping the cult.

Erunner says:

BrianD, I watched every episode of Remini’s show and she does have a “potty” mouth. Quite severe. I imagine her interview with Joe was very explicit. I think I read that she’s having troubles getting another season of her show on the air. Don’t know if it’s ratings or what.

If A&E thought a series or special re PFM was ratings worthy I’m sure they’d do something with it.

Thanks for the response and God’s best to you!

μαθητής says:

anonymous,
I’m so sorry. Your sex life is between you, your husband and the Lord. Period.

These were the words I was hoping to read from your post.

” By the grace of God and my strong husband I am slowly healing. ”

God is faithful, and I trust your husband is also. Blessed are the poor in spirit . . .

Sean Tribble says:

I do not even know what to say or how to respond. I was involved with PFM from July 2009 until December 2010. I know some of those who have commented here and others were before my time and others after. However your stories are not lost on me and are all too real. The details of my story, of my time are much the same as the stories that have been shared, with some exceptions. Some of you that I know and I do not know have suffered much more. When I left, it was time to go and I had a safe place to retreat to. Others have not been and perhaps are still not so fortunate. The people I left behind, I think all of us who left are still dealing with that thought. We had to go, but how could we leave others there. The abuse is built in and for the things that came from peers, I hold no fault. For any offense I offered, I am deeply sorry. My heart breaks. I thought I had been long over this, but while my focus has been consumed these last three days, I have realized just how not over it I am. I have been working to reach out to those I can find and express my concern and sorrows for leaving and not reaching out (though you are threatened so as to keep you from reaching out to anyone still in the program). If I have not been able to reach out to you and you would like to reach out to reconnect, please do so as it would mean so much. When you live on site and work with, eat with, play with, study with, pray with, worship with, cry with, celebrate with these people over a year and a half and have to cut all ties, it is heart breaking. Knowing others have the same exact story… devastating.
If you are reading this and know me, for my part in leaving, I am sorry. For my not reaching out, I am sorry. For all the mishandled choices that I would do differently now, I am sorry. If you were there with me, you know me from my time with you, I miss you; all of you. That is, all but those who are the place where the abuse sprang from, Mike and Pam. If you were a peer and are worried that I am holding anything against you for anything said or not said, the answer is, NOT IN THE LEAST. We were conditioned and no blame falls to you for this. But now many of you, many of us, are speaking up and standing up together to see that the light is brought to this darkness.
I am so grateful for all the brave ones who have spoken up. I am grateful for the safe places that have been created for this need and for those who have been safe people for those with this need. If you do not feel you can speak up, we stand with you. Your story is our story and our story is your story. Though we all have this in common, there is something greater than this we also share; A God who loves us and is angered by the abuse that we have experienced in His name. I am so thankful for the grace that is available to us, that the price for that grace has been paid and the love that paid that price has been poured out on us. I understand that it may not feel like it sometimes, right now, or maybe not at all for some of us. I am grateful that the light of a new day is dawning and our hope for healing, from the wounds and loss of relationships and friends, is at hand. And I am grateful to God for His grace that sustains us and brings healing. There are too many who have had a great need for it in the aftermath of their time spent in this organization.
Sean Tribble seanatribble@gmail.com

Paige says:

I just looked at PFM and the Rozell’s facebook pages and it all appears to business as usual…. not attempts at defense, or mention of being ‘attacked or falsely discredited, etc…. The “pay no attention to the man behind the curtain” strategy, I guess….

I do wonder about the fate of the orphans in the various orphanages that are ‘supported’ by PFM, if the ‘ministry’ collapses….

Lisa McLellan says:

Sounds EXACTLY like how the “youth lead ministry” at Freshlife Church were treated. Investigate that. When my daughter left the ministry she was shunned and ghosted. Staff was expected to put incredible “volunteer hours” in with no pay. You were “all in” or out and a traitor to the ministry. Sounds very familiar.

Anon says:

I’m another one grappling with the shame and confusion of so many years lost working in this abusive environment. There were no limits to the boundaries that were crossed, and we tolerated it because it was our “reasonable service.” There was/is a pervasive message here: your devotion to PFM is evidence of your love and faith in God. So of course you will give it your all.

These are things we tried to express to the family when we finally reached the end of our ropes and came home. And even then, it’s clumsy and conflicting to communicate because your worry is that you are gossiping and divisive. So you don’t talk about it.
And you remain in silent turmoil as your former friends shun you, and the church family you left behind (to go serve in Montana) have been warned (with a call from Mike) that you are “poison,” and they avoid you, believing the lies. You feel like all that you went through was for nothing. The irony is, all of his tight-fisted micromanaging is an attempt to portray the image that “his ministry” is above reproach, when he is the one that made it reproachable. And he made people afraid; consumed with obtaining approval by all of their hard work and compliance…. the opposite of GRACE. And that is not the GOSPEL.

Brothers in sisters, if you are still there, and by some miracle read this, please remember that you cannot earn God’s favor. Jesus loves you even on your worst day. You cannot improve upon the work of the cross. It is perfect and complete. That is good news- never scary or exhausting. And you WILL REBUILD. Just be patient with yourself and try not to compare your progress with others. And maybe now, you have something that many of us did not have. A church to go home to, with pastors who believe you, and walk you through this.

The New Victor says:

“Assault does not necessarily involve a physical attack. Assault is any action that causes the other person to fear bodily harm. It can be a slap, a punch or a shove, but it can also be a verbal threat of violence, aggressive posturing (a raised fist, jabbing a finger) or _yelling angrily in someone’s face_ Simple assault is a Class B misdemeanor, punishable by up to 180 days in jail.”

The gun story, likely another crime. Yelling in a closed room for hours? There isn’t a story yet where a person tried to leave and was physically kept from doing so (if I missed that, I apologize… I’m saddened and sickened reading your stories, especially thinking about my little kids) , hard to say… also being purposely cut off from contacting help, which if so, is a felony.

This may not be the time to discuss this, but I was thinking today about the Christian family culture that might implicitely enable newly adult kids to make them suceptible to accepting such abusive behaviors for the cause of Christ. I’m a long time past 18. I can’t say that I wouldn’t have been also cowed in the face of extreme anger at that age. I was a meek kid. Submitting to authority shouldn’t mean being eaten by lions (or wolves) in this century.

Tanner Bell says:

I was a part of the first ignite intern class. Let me start off by saying that I no longer attend a church. While being fully honest, I would like to say that I’m constantly trying to fight my bitterness towards the church and am trying to come to a point where I can find the truth. I would also like to start off on a positive note.

Although my time at pottersfield was filled with many of the things that this article has mentioned there were many things that changed me for the better. I could begin by speaking about the many people that I’m still friends with, or the people that helped me. I however would like to give those people the anonymity that they deserve. I however would like to give credit to one person in particular, Pastor Jim Randall. I miss him very much. He helped me in more ways than I can begin to say and I still regret to this day not saying goodbye to him before he passed. I was at a point in my life where I was still very bitter and confused at what had happened. I felt as though I was running from the church and all that he was going to do was guilt me back in to it, which was farther away from his character then I can say. Rest in peace pastor Jim, and thank you for all that you did for my life.

Now moving on to my experience at pottersfield

I remember when I decided to go to pottersfield. I was really depressed and highly anxious at the time. I felt like I was going nowhere with my life or my faith. I was so nervous that I was going to lose my faith and not do anything with my life. With that being said I was really drawn in by the sales pitch at the time. The sales pitch was to donate 1 year of your life and you will be closer to Jesus than you ever were before. Looking back on it I can’t believe that that was ever a sales pitch that was endorsed by the church. The idea behind it being that if you do this thing (commit a year) God will reward you in this way (being closer to him). The whole heart of it is so far from what the Bible teaches and so far from the gospel. Here in lies, I believe the main fundamental belief in what was being taught at pottersfield.

After arriving at the camp I remember we used to do these things called ibs. During these classes we would take one verse at a time and write a piece on how that verse affected us, what we learned and how we would apply that verse to our lives today. Keep in mind I still had crippling anxiety at this point. I could not fathom how I would apply “Jesus wept” or whatever the verse may have been to my life while I was surrounded by Christians all day. Being the realistic person that I am, combined with the fact that I couldn’t understand why god wasn’t speaking to me on each verse I could not come up with a good piece every single day. (This may be a poor example but you get the point) I remember multiple times getting sent out of the class because I did not complete the assignment to it entirety. I was treated as though I didn’t care and God wasn’t speaking to me which is what I desperately wanted.

I could go on a lot of tangents.. possibly about how Mike put himself in the middle of a romantic relationship that was forming between me and someone else (he didn’t want the camp mentality or the bad name of relationships not working out) or I could talk about how he would choose favorites at the camp. He would often refer to these people as the “poster children” of ignite. After my friend left I was deemed the poster child of pottersfield at the time. Something I didn’t want but was a tactic to get other people in. I could go on a lot of tangents, if you would like to know more please reach out. I will put my email at the end of this piece.

I think often about the stories that Mike would tell, because at the time I looked up to him and how god spoke to him and changed him. The main story that I remember is about how a pastor, that we called pastor G, made him clean the toilets of the church for a year. Apparently Mike came in as a sinner who needed to be broken but wanted to be a big pastor. This was the tactic used to break him and make him a “servant of the lord”. This I think is what lead to Mikes idea that “the ground below the cross isn’t level” or however he said it. He may have been messed up in his teachings but this seems to be what ft lauterdale and overall calvary chapel taught him. Looking back and reading this article makes me think that Mike certainly was a narcissist, or had some sort of disorder. However this was also the mentality that he was taught… you do the dirty work and get humiliated then you are forgiven of your sins and god turns you into a pastor. (Please note that this does not make it okay for the way that he treated people, I do believe that we are each responsible for our own actions, especially as adults)

My whole point for bringing up Mikes “spiritual upbringing” is pointing out the belief that this seems to be a systemic problem with the way that discipleship is taught. This seems to be a theme with Calvary chapel and pottersfield is taking the brunt of it, and granted they are the most extreme/worst example of this.

I do believe that pottersfield was a cult. I also believe that Pottersfield charged far more than they should have for us to be “interns”. I sincerely wish that I could go back in time and save those thousands upon thousands of dollars.

I know that a lot of people seeing this will say that I am bitter, and I am sure to some point that is true. I am truly trying my best get over that part of it and see it just for the facts. However for these people that are commenting here please do not talk to them as if they are exagerating. That is in fact victim blaming, and I am here to say that that first class was bad. Yes when Don Mcclure was there it was obvious that he was chauffeured around as if he was a board member to be pleased and lastly it would be shocking if things did not get worse after the first class left. This is why I fully believe this article, because all know how much harder it is to get better and not worse, especially with no accountability and a staff that is trained to just do with it what you say.

If you would like any more info my email is tannerbell101@gmail.com

PS I apologize for being all over the place. I am writing this late at night because I could not sleep until I wrote something.

PPS Thats obviously Mike Rozell as the mudman burgers logo

Debra Gerold says:

I agreewith your comment on McClure. And alk this posts.. they are one sided except a few. PFM was never given the Matthew 18. Isnt that biblical? Go first, then a second time, and if a third is required, let the authority take care of it? And where is the mercy, God has shone to all of us. Has things changed in the last 3-4 years? Has anyone investigated that? What about the damage that is taking place right now and in the past couple of months, with the students? Does anyone consider how the enemy can use this to throw in the towel and walk away from God? If the students and staff are at risk from Rozell, they ares more at risk from CCA and their actions. There is more to this stiory than is being reported. This is a one way story. Arent you innocent until proven guilty? CCA carries way to big of a stick. If they have disassociated themselves with PFM, then why are they still involved trying to destroy it? When you disassociate with any tjing, you no longer are involved with that person , company etc. People need to quit taking sides and judge so quickly. I see Un-Godliness here. No Matt 18, no grace, no mercy , no thoughts of restoration, no love. I do see Gossip, talebearing, slander, & pride with those involved. God is a God of Mercy, 2 ,3,7,10,100 chances, forgiveness , restoration ,refreshment. This is putting the Lord’s name to shame because people are to quick to take matters into their own hands , and not go about these matters by God’s word. I am ashamed of Don McClure, CCA, and you Micheal for not acting in a Godly manner about PFM. I beliueve there is a much bigger motive than is being reported.

Jessica says:

PFM needs to be shut down.

SavannaM says:

This needs to go viral. I’ve forwarded this article to all the major national news services– everyone do the same and maybe we can get this broadcast nationwide. Also make sure to speak out on your social media accounts (Twitter, Instagram, Facebook) and tag PFM’s accounts.

Jenna Ruiz says:

Debra–
The cycle of abuse is as follows:

Love and kindness —> over protection in the name of love —>power gained through isolation –>control over resources and activities —->punishment through anger and harm —-> acting as if nothing happened —> love and kindness.

It’s why so many of us stayed. It’s why so many of us felt love and hope that things would be different in the future.

I’m not willing to put my feelings and hope above the safety of others. This place does not reflect the heart of God. Perhaps it’s mission is good, but God can take care of His children around the world without the help of PFM.

Mud Man (not the PFM kind BTW) says:

Why is it in our modern “Christian” paradigm so many seem to forget about justice?

A sage from the Middle ages said this, “to show mercy on the wicked is to bring wickedness on the innocent.”

Another interpretation of the same thing, “He Who is compassionate to the cruel will ultimately become cruel to the compassionate.”

Of course this doesn’t mean we become a mob and fail to show true justice and due process. It also doesn’t stop us from mourning over the fact we have an obligation to bring such to the guilty.

PFM is neither independent or free from scrutiny and we should be reminded neither are we. Jesus’ resurrection did not relieve the duty of His followers to live in a manner worthy of the calling.

Thank you for bringing this to the attention of all of us.

Debra Gerold says:

These testimonies are true, but th ere are more that came out over the years that did not have these testimonies. I am sorry you are not interested in th eir stories.
Thank you.

McGarrett says:

Debra Gerold,

I have a great idea, get your granddaughter out of there. This is Fool’s Gold.

Em says:

There seems to be a personality type that is swayed by show – perhaps they best fit the description our Lord gave us: sheep
I read Debra G.’s posts here and ask myself why she cannot grasp that her granddaughter is in a dangerous place? Why, in light of the project here to help the betrayed salvage their lives and their faith, she would muddy the waters? Why she would speak in defense of a dangerous cult?
I think Debra’s heart may be in the right place, but she needs to take to heart the admonition to “renew our minds” and then her heart, too, will respond. At least that has been my experience.. ?

Em says:

FWIW…
I think your advice and observation are rock solid, New Victor

Anonymous says:

Debra…

Here’s the thing. There are great memories, great life-long friends were made, the LORD did move and did a work because He is sovereign regardless of man. Even in the midst of the pain and distress way too many (including myself, and as Michael said, only one testimony of this abuse would be too much) are feeling, I am desperately trying to separate those good things from the intensely evil and negative things. I want to cling to God through this difficult time- I want to see His hand in this. I’m not necessarily there yet because I am in deep pain, but I seek to be there with the Lord’s help and in His timing.

It breaks my heart to even have to ask this…but what if Alexa called you and shared any one of these stories of abuse with you? How would you respond? How would you feel then? I implore you to look at the situation from that perspective. Please. There are countless people, such as your granddaughter, out there who have truly experienced these horrific events. I am one of those people. I beg you to set the semantics aside and put yourself in our beaten and bloodied shoes. Do it for her sake if not for ours. Please.

Kenzie Kinney says:

Debra –

Let’s say you ordered a pizza for delivery. You ate it and loved it. Your family ate it and loved it. One of your friends works for the pizza place. She tells you it’s getting shut down because of the disgusting environment and how all the food is rotten, staff drops it on the floor, blood is all over the bathrooms, staff spits in food all the time, they steal customer’s credit card info, there are rats everywhere and people have been hospitalized after eating there.

You’re the disgusting person saying “but my pizza was good, nothing was wrong with it! They shouldn’t shut it down! I mean you’re not even mentioning the good pizzas! You’re just focusing on what’s wrong with the place and that’s not fair!”

IF SOMETHING THIS SEVERE IS WRONG WITH A PLACE, THE “GOOD” FROM IT CEASES TO MATTER, LET ALONE BE ENOUGH TO MENTION.

The only good in that place are those little moments God gives us in the darkness as He’s trying to keep people from killing themselves until they have a chance to escape. Of COURSE there was good in these terrible situations, but that’s not the point.

Why are you ignoring what’s going on here? If you really had a granddaughter in the program and read everything here, you should be ashamed of yourself for not immediately being terrified for her safety and well being. A real grandmother who actually loved her family would pull her out of this immediately.

Honestly, I’m also not convinced you’re not PFM staff because no one is as shitty of a grandma as you claim to be. Lord help the rest of your family if it’s true, but otherwise, stop jumping on this thread. Feel free to report back to whoever. 😉

Sonesta Josephsen says:

I’ve already shared an experience from my re-entry but I feel like there’s more that needs to be said. I was in IGNITE class 11 from 2016-2017.

When I was in Guatemala, my parents called and informed me that the doctors had found a cancerous lump in my dad’s bladder. I was devastated. They assured me that they had caught it early and they would inform me if anything changes. During this time NONE of the PFM leaders asked me if I wanted to go home or gave me consistent phone privileges. When it was my time to have internet, the schedule always changed. I asked to use the main phone and was denied.
Two weeks went by and I wasn’t able to get an update.

During my time in Guat I also gained quite a bit of weight. I was so embarrassed (still am even as I write this out) – I couldn’t button my jeans anymore. I only had 2 skirts to wear but often times the Antigua mornings were so brisk I could see my breath in the air. I begged the leaders to take me pants shopping since we weren’t allowed to leave the compound without them. All I wanted was one pair that I could wear comfortably! I felt disgusting and there wasn’t much time to workout in the evenings between mandatory meetings and homework.
In the end, nobody ever did take me shopping. I was told that I “should be thankful for what I have” and that “clothes shopping on a missions trip is vanity” and they “didn’t have time” even though I explained my extreme need.
I ended up wearing a long shirt while I used hair ties to extend the room between my front two belt loops just so I could wear them.

Another time we did a “team building” exercise where we were blindfolded and our partner would have to yell directions to guide us from the middle of the courtyard, while we navigated the obstacle course in the ring surrounding it. They had 2 teams going at a time. They had basketballs dribbling around the blindfolded person, blow horns going off, and people who would surround the blindfolded person and whisper to them to distract them. (I remember thinking the whispers sounded demonic and my hair stood on end)They did this to illustrate how hard it is to listen to the Holy Spirit in a world of chaos. Okay, sure, I get that…I guess. But then they brought out the fireworks. I kid you not. They started setting of firecrackers at the blindfolded person’s feet. All of us who were waiting were shocked as we watched kids drop to the floor from fright and start crying. If they tried taking the blindfold off they were yelled at in their faces. A few of us in line tried to get them to stop but were yelled at to “shut up and stand in line”. We all ended up having to take a turn going through the course blindfolded. Most of us trembling by the end.

One of the reoccurring, hardest issues for me to deal with in Guatemala was a male intern who had a crush on me. Let me just say that crushes or male/female relationships of any kind was forbidden. (So stupid. You’re getting 20+ young adults together and not expecting them to be human)
This guy would buy me candy and gifts and would sit next to me in class quite often. He’d offer to carry my backpack and walk with me as all of us would go on town outings. I did not reciprocate his feelings. However, when he first arrived he was not a saved Christian (I don’t know how he was allowed there) and nobody was making friends with him. I felt bad and was trying to be friendly to him so he didn’t feel alone. My friendliness was mistaken for flirting and he told multiple people he loved me. As far as I know, he wasn’t talked to by the leaders.
I wasn’t that lucky. I was pulled aside multiple times and was told that I needed to “stop being a Jezebel” to “stop flirting and leading him on”. I was accused of trying to find alone time with him when actually he would find me when I was by myself. I was so frustrated! I told him to stop buying me things and would ask a few girls to stand with me if they saw him start to talk to me while I was alone.
It started to become a fear for me. I would try to keep from catching his eye. I would lower my gaze if I passed him anywhere and would feel panicked and anxiety if he gave me anything or did anything for me because I knew the leaders were watching and I would get in trouble.
I still struggle with feeling like I’m leading a guy on even if I catch his gaze in the grocery store. I still feel anxiety and a rush of panic if I catch a man looking at me. Even if it’s an old man! What the heck is that all about?! They created such a fear in me that I’m the issue. That I, a woman, am the reason men have lust and “stumble in their walk”.
This is not the woman I was before I joined the ministry!
This was the PFM mentality though. They are extremely sexist.
One time Austin was teaching and we were sitting on the rooftop of the coffee shop. He started going on a rant and said “women should be more careful about how they dress so they don’t temp men”.
The girls were also pulled into a meeting and were told that we needed to “step down and let the guys step up”. We were “too strong” and “the guys weren’t being given the chance to serve because we were doing everything”. Heck yes we were doing everything! If we saw a need like the chairs needed to be stacked, we’d stack them. It’s not like we were pushing them out of the way. They just didn’t do anything that needed doing. From that moment on we were forbidden from stacking chairs or setting up tables because it the guys needed to learn. This never made any sense to me. They should have encouraged the guys to see us as an example and try to out serve us instead of making us the issue.

There are many other instances that happened in Guatemala that are coming back to me in with floods of emotion. Others that seem like fogged up glass that I’m trying to see through. While I am happy to have met my teammates and to have had wonderful moments with God during my prayer time, my faith is not as strong as before I joined PFM.

I ended up serving my 6 months in Cambodia. Cambodia was the hardest portion of my life that I’ve gone through. I was riddled with panic attacks, parasites, lice, extreme anxiety, depression, emotional abuse from the girl’s leader, and hives. It’s its own story that I’m still processing.

I wrote the excerpt below in a journal during my two months of serving in Selah. (Since I lived in Columbia Falls, MT during the time, Selah was considered my home church. After 3 months of schools and 6 months serving, interns are required to spend 2 months serving their home church before they are considered done with the program.)

6.7.17
“Father, I was asked today if I was praying and considering staying with Potters Field through the fall. I said yes but you and I know that’s the farthest thing from the truth. I am like a kicked dog on a leash. I will sit patiently with a slack line but as soon as the leash is removed, I’m ready to run.”

Midwife says:

Thank you Sonesta for your story. It tears my heart out to read the emotional violence done to you and your fellow classmates by PFM. I’m an old woman now but back in the 70s I too was abused by a pastor and his chosen leaders. I understand that crazy guilt you carry around like you are the problem and cause of men’s thoughts and stares. I just hope you talk more, tell your story and heal so you don’t become an older woman that continues to look down and away from others eyes out of some false sense of shame. You and your classmates amaze me with how articulate you are. I see such a bright future for you because you are working through this abuse and sharing it so others can too. Be strong, keep telling your story and know how much God loves you.

The New Victor says:

” I asked to use the main phone and was denied.”

In the United States, this is likely a felony, blocking another person or taking their means to call for help. Two cops and a therapist told me this concerning a situation like this in my family.

That team building exercise sounds frightening. This and other stories go beyond LGAT (Large Group Awareness Training) which I think itself is cultish in nature (see “est” and Werner Erhard).

Stoptheabuse says:

Pam Rozell is 100% complicit in every thing Mike has done and continues to do!
These stories are abhorrent. And to do it all in the name of the Lord is a whole new level!
While the spiritual abuse is certainly the most grievous part of these stories, nothing of real consequence (here on earth) will stop the Rozells from morphing this reign of terror into a new ministry, unless the authorities investigate! The IRS, Montana Dept of Revenue, and the Department of Labor & Industry need to investigate the books of PFM, PFR, and MUDMAN! Including the equestrian “program” at Potters Field Lodge! Forensic accountants will likely have a field day!
Maybe the Rozells could start a prison ministry from the comfort of their own cells!
Prayers for those egregiously abused by these lost and deviant souls!

Becky says:

For the past 10 years I have struggled with seeing the seemingly “good things” that were happening with PFM. I would hear of all these new students that were coming from everywhere (including my own home church where my pastor chose to believe Don McClure over what my husband and I were telling him we saw- that’s another whole sore subject as he was a second dad to me growing up). Anyway, I finally settled in my heart to chalk it up to the fact that God was somehow using Mike and Pam in spite of themselves (the same way He uses me in spite of myself quite frankly).

Last year I was reading Matthew 7 where Jesus is talking about false teachers. He said you will know them by their fruit. All of a sudden it hit me- I had been confusing “good things” with “good fruit”! I was looking at all the “good things” like a growing ministry, orphanages, Mudman restaurants opening all over, etc. and thinking that was the fruit of their ministry. That’s not fruit! The fruit of the Spirit is LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS, and SELF-CONTROL!! ????? All of which are extremely lacking to say the least! Any fruit that is coming from this place is rotten fruit.
Just wanted to share that little revelation that helped me a lot.

Col46 says:

Thanks Becky, so easy to mistake “good things” for good fruit! That reminder blessed me personally!

Midwife says:

Powerful Jessica. Thank you and thank you again for speaking up for women in this not-cool cult mentality of Calvary Chapel.

Anon says:

Becky, The part of your comment about the fruit of the spirit is so helpful! Thank you for bringing it up.
It is sad that your home pastor/2nd dad did not listen to your concerns. At church was he a man like Mike? Did he treat people like him? In his 2nd dad-ness to you did you see him treat people in his personal life like Mike? I can’t grasp how a “father” could ignore his “daughter’s” warnings unless you were showing him his own similar sin.

Steve says:

Jessica, I used to be so negative about membership but I’ve done a 180 degree reversal in my thinking over the years. Also I’m convinced that the most healthy church polity is a hybrid between an elder led and congregational rule. It may not be the most efficient but it helps to hold people accountable. A purely elder led is dangerous in that it can become a good ole boys club with no checks and balances from congregation. I’ve seen that happen. A purely congregational polity can result in chaos. And we all know what can happen in the local pope or CC model.

Kay Kuran says:

As others have said, thank you so much Michael <3 Your support has meant the world for us and we couldn't have done any of this without you.

Shannon says:

I’m a parent and long time attender of CC who experienced spiritual abuse because of our lack of support for PF. Students returning from PF were in turn abusing our youth and their peers. I have a hard time writing about it since it still hurts deeply.

We have family who were on staff with GFA that we watched walk through the painful Diaspora process and healing. Because of their experience, our red flag senses were on high when our CC started sending students (as young as 16) to Potter’s Field. We spoke with our youth direct to let him know the flags we saw and that we wouldn’t be comfortable sending our children to PF, so ‘please be careful how to you ‘talk it up with the kids’. We shared with him the mess of GFA and the flags to be watching for and he essentially ignored us, “PF is nothing like GFA.”

In early spring, we had three male students return from PF – two were on the field in Africa, one in Guatemala. To finish their internship process, they asked if they could run a kids club at the church through the summer. They invited the youth kids to help them run it, but after the first meeting, my daughter came home in tears and shaking. They were told that they didn’t have to volunteer to help them this summer, but if they really wanted to grow as Christians they would. If you choose not to, you’re choosing to not grow. They were also told that they would have to ‘obey instantly’ to what they were asked to do. This was guised as being ‘fully intentional’ in your ministry work. To make matters worse, our youth leader wasn’t in the meeting. There was no oversight (that we could see) as to what was happening.

We immediately called the youth pastor to let him know what our daughter had experienced and he was apologetic and said he’d speak to the student leaders. A week later he told me, “they answered my questions about spiritual authority exactly as you would expect. I don’t think there’s a problem.” We hesitantly aloud two of kids to volunteer, but one in particular came home upset week after week. She said she felt like she was always being watched and was never good enough.

Since we weren’t getting anywhere with the youth pastor, we met with our pastor and told him what we were experiencing. He was quiet and said, “I had no idea this was going on.” I told him I thought it would be wise to gather all the youth together and explain what proper spiritual authority looks like – servant leadership. And it would probably be good to talk to the PF kids about their leadership. They were lording authority over the others, which isn’t good, Biblical or healthy. We again talked about the correlation to GFA, which he quickly blew off.

We decided to pull our kids out of the youth program until the authority issue was cleared up. THREE months went by and nothing. . . finally, a parent meeting with the youth leader where he told us that kids were not expected to ‘obey their leaders like they would their parents (which they had been told)’ and that we just need to move forward. I asked again, “are you ever going to talk to the youth about proper spiritual authority?” No clear answer. By this time a few families were about to leave over the issue and the pastor must have gotten wind of it, so we had another parent meeting, but this time with the pastor and his wife and one student from PF. I was told in the meeting that I was the one who caused confusion since I didn’t go directly to the student causing my kids pain – I should have gone directly to him and not to the youth pastor. Apparently, according to them, that was the cause of the problem. All the other parents sheepishly spoke up saying, “I don’t think I would be comfortable going to someone else’s kid – we would go to the youth pastor.” We were then made to feel bad for even considering ‘leaving the family’. After all, family doesn’t just leave family. Nothing really came from the meeting other than, ‘we’re moving on’, but the real issue of abused spiritual authority was never addressed.

For the past year, I had been teaching the youth girls through Romans & Hebrews, but had stopped due to the ‘Kid’s Club’ over the summer and then pulling our kids out of the youth. Parents in the meeting were asking me if I’d teach again, but as I looked toward our pastor, he didn’t give any indication he was okay with it.

Within two days, my husband and I found ourselves in a closed door meeting with our pastor where he laid out his reasons for why he ‘doesn’t trust me with women in the church’. The reasons ranged from, ‘you talk too much in BS’ to ‘ you obviously have spiritual authority issues’. It came up that I had never asked his wife to disciple me and going forward, they suggest I be discipled by their daughter, who is very soft spoken. Essentially, I need to brought into humble submission. My husband is livid at this point. ‘So, your hail mary is for her to be discipled by your daughter?’. Things I had shared in the women’s BS were brought up, which I could hardly believe. I thought BS was a place where you could share without it being ‘held against you’ and how did our pastor know what I was saying in a women’s BS? I can’t tell you how fast I ran out of the building and I will NEVER EVER go back! I got in our car and stared hyper ventilating.

A few days later we receive an email from the pastor’s wife where she laid out how dangerous I am for discipling young believers in our church – I’m a cancer cell that goes off on its own and other’s will follow. But then, a few days later she sent another email not apologizing, but saying she doesn’t like that side of herself and she just wants to ‘start over’ with me. What?! How do I do that? Especially since she wasn’t sorry for what she called me.

We had to cut all ties with the church expect for a few key families who knew what we were enduring. Even now that it’s come out that PF is a cult, we haven’t heard anything from the church. I suppose we shouldn’t expect it, but I’ve had to face the reality of spiritual abuse and the authority issues at CC – once you go beyond the veil as we did. I was the kid abused in the back bedroom that no one saw, so no one wants to believe it happened.

There’s no one above our pastor to go to share our story. There’s no accountability. The church has two elders – the youth pastor and associate pastor.

For those who are coming out of PF, I highly recommend reading “The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse’ by David Johnson and Jeff Van Vonderen. It has been healing, but I admit, it will be a long time before I feel ready to open my heart to the church body again. We’ve found a wonderful church, but it will take time for me. . . and my kids. They are also facing the pain of abuse.

JM says:

It seems that CC and PFM are inextricably intertwined and belie a whole host of sinful problems in both camps. What you describe, Shannon, is essentially what happened to us in one CC we attended. The problem that was complained about only got worse until many parties suffered and we were the ones shown the door after some false accusations. Friends and family who were part of that church did not believe us, betrayed us and stayed. Even when things blew up–no one came back to say we were right. To this day, we have many friends and family members who have moved on to other CC’s for cause, but still remain within the system mesmerized by whatever “aura” seems attached to CC. Their actions defy rational thinking. It would appear they have drunk some kind of “spiritual kool-aid”. Interesting that, in discussions of cult or cult-like behavior, the increasing irrational thinking of the members comes up.

Barb says:

I have just completed reading all the comments and related articles. As I personally know most of you, my heart is grieving.
My husband and I have been volunteers and supporters of this ministry for seven years. Until June 3 of this year I was unaware of the depth and severity of what has transpired over the years. I knew there were issues… I have to go through my own turmoil and journey of not seeing the signs for what was really happening. I want to publicly apologize to all of you who know us for our not having my eyes opened sooner. From the bottom of our hearts please forgive me.
In December 2018 my dear sweet friend who I loved with all my heart and her husband left in the middle of the night. (This is where I beat myself up. Why didn’t I question this more. It happened so many times. These kinds of departures happened so many times, and were either never discussed or lied about. We were given another story or we never even knew they left. When we asked where the individuals were we were told a different version of the truth.)
In January of this year when the Calvary association began to take a stand against the Rozell’s I began to pray constantly. It was as if I couldn’t stop praying about this. The burden was so heavy on my heart. I began to pray for truth to be revealed. I prayed for six months like this. I would wake up in the middle of the night and very early, praying, and continuing all day long.
It was on June 3 when I met with a brave and courageous young couple who stepped forward and this honorable, noble young man stood up to the Rozells and had the courage to tell the truth openly and without malice.
They had become very dear to us and when they shared the truth I knew that God was answering my prayer.

I would like to share the letter I wrote to mike.

June 25, 2019

Dear Michael,

It is with a heavy heart that this letter is written. You know that we have given our heart and soul to this ministry. Nearly seven years ago in July, we came to Montana and we were so thrilled to be a part of PFM. We gave whatever monies God had provided through the years to support the ministry. We gave our time, we opened our home always, and we did it all with loving hearts.

Through the years we have seen several things of concern, but we always gave grace. We knew there were issues, and yet we continued to stand by you and Pam. There were good things that we saw and experienced with PFM.

In January, when accusations were made against you we defended you. We defended you and Pam even to some others that we had loved and had good friendships with.

You know that I had been praying and praying night and day. I told you this many times. I often woke up in the middle of the night praying. I kept praying for truth to be revealed, and I honestly thought it would be in your favor.

When I got the call on Monday, June 3, I had just been praying for 45 minutes. My heart was heavy. Again, I prayed for truth to be revealed. Dave told me that Kendra and Derek were leaving. We had developed a close friendship with them. They have proven themselves to be persons of great character and integrity, and I trust them completely. I called Kendra and asked her why and she said, “Do you really want to know?” We went and sat with them that evening and we were shocked by what we heard.

I felt compelled to do my own investigation, for two reasons. I did not want to accept heresay, but find out for myself. Also, I was a teacher for over 20 years, and I took an oath. If I suspected abuse, I would act on it. That oath is still a part of who I am.

I did not call the McClures, as you would suspect. I began to call people that had left and we never heard from them again and I began to hear the same story over and over. The recurring words were “fear”, “manipulation” and “control. ” Since June 3, I have personally spoken to more than 20 former interns [many, many more by now] and I only asked them why they left. I did not try to get them to say anything. I have to tell you that there were many days that I was trembling and physically ill from what I heard.
We have also spoken to pastors whom we trust who have had former interns who have acknowledged that there were similar wrongdoings, but they were afraid to come forward. There are more than a dozen interns in this category.

This is not not even counting other adults who have had bad dealings. I heard that without going to anyone. Regarding my friend ——-; you told her in a meeting [ in December 2018] where my husband was present, along with pastor m that you would help her by paying her $1000 a month in exchange for her creating the website and using her creative talents. As of this day, she has not been paid for her last month, and she worked many more hours than agreed upon. How could you treat a hurting woman like that?

Based upon overwhelming evidence we have made our own conclusions. You have wounded your sheep.
“Shepherd the flock of God which is among you, serving as overseers, not by compulsion but willingly, not for dishonest gain but eagerly; nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock;”
1 Peter 5:2-3 – NKJV

You have not displayed, nor do you continue to display the characteristics of a godly leader. Despite the good things from your ministry, there are too many issues. You have cheated these young people financially, under the guise of ministry. You have misrepresented the Gospel in a myriad of ways to vulnerable young souls looking for water in a dry and thirsty world. You have been dishonest with Dave and me repeatedly.

At first I was very angry, but I have come to feel sorry for you. Yes, we are all sinners, but you are called to a higher calling as a “pastor.” This is even more defined as you are responsible for young people, many just new in the faith. Are you aware of how many you have wounded? Some don’t go to church, some have trouble reading the Bible, and those that still trust our Saviour are struggling with the things they have experienced, seen, or the false doctrines you have shown them, either by direct words or your behavior.

As a result, we can no longer be a part of the ministry or church. It breaks our hearts because we have spent the last seven years of our lives there.
We love and care deeply so very much for everyone there, but I am quite certain that no one will contact us as you tell them we are “trashing the ministry.” How do I know this? Because we have seen and heard this time after time through the years.

By the way, as I came to my own conclusion, so did —. I did not share things with him, but we allowed him to seek God, and The Holy Spirit gave him his own discernment. He knew things weren’t right, but he wanted so badly to go into the Ignite program that he was willing to overloook. But after speaking to you in your office on June 12, he made his own decision.

In conclusion, we have experienced lies, deception and cover up, and these have continued long after January 2019. They continued until our last conversation.

We cannot be a part of or support a ministry where such things are happening.
Absolutely CANNOT.
You are not the man we thought you were.

Our hearts are breaking over this. We will pray for healing for you.

Again, my intention in sharing this is to humbly ask forgiveness from so many of you that have been deeply affected by the spiritual and emotional abuse. We know that Pastor Jim Randall and Patti and so many others were oblivious, as were we, to the horrific treatment that went on behind closed doors. I try not to dwell on regrets in my life, but this is a tough one. Believe me, if only I could go back and do things differently, and SEE things differently…

As for those of you from the outside, please be careful not to judge so severely. Listen to all theses accounts of seriously wounded individuals. And I know personally many more who still are afraid to speak out. Many more. I ask you not to be so harsh with your criticisms of who should have done more. We were all lied to, deceived and manipulated. There was a great deal of good, godly people who were associated and involved. Now that I look back, they were all used to promote and to strengthen the facade. I dearly love every staff member, and I can’t imagine what they are going through. These are wonderful, caring, loving people who unfortunately fell under ungodly, twisted leadership. My heart grieves deeply for them. We love them, too, but I’m not sure they feel the same since we left. I hope one day they will realize that it was never them we were against, but the two who caused all this pain.

Again, I ask forgiveness for not seeing this sooner or attempting to investigate sooner. I will pray for you all every day, and we love you as we always have, only now with a deeper sense of concern and care. Please feel free to reach out to me if there’s anything I can do, or just to talk.

JM says:

I Don’t know if this info is even useful, but it’s a link to a site called, “Charity Navigator” and they give a rating of Potter’s Field.
https://www.charitynavigator.org/index.cfm?bay=search.summary&orgid=14092

Jerod says:

What is the whistleblower policy these folks signed on to? What was yours Laura, if you can remember?

Jeff Bower says:

Laura –

YWAM has 1,100 ministry locations in 181 countries. Unfortunately, there is going to be some rouge leader in one or more of these places, but blanketing them and labeling the entire organization as abusive is sloppy, and quite frankly, slanderous. I was on staff with PFR for six years and endured the abuse of the Rozell’s, and currently, my son is serving in Australia at a YWAM base. We were, of course, paying attention to the leadership dynamics of his particular base; however, PFR / PFM was really just one tiny pebble in the ocean of ministry.

It is tragic for any group to have a leader that gloats in his or her authority and lords it over others, and sadly, this happens from the Baptists and Presbyterians to the AOG’s and every non-profit group in between. I’ll even say that although I disaffiliated with Calvary Chapel years ago as a local pastor, and joined another network, people should know that there are hundreds of really great Calvary Chapel churches around the world. I’ve met dozens of pastors who are sincere and love their people and who would never look to abuse the role of authority. Their particular form of government may lend to more rouge leadership, but that never means all men fall prey to this temptation, just like not all 1,100 YWAM bases have weirdo’s running the show.

Case by case, man by man, examine the fruit. The most freeing thing a Christian can study is church history. We’ve all been nothing but knuckleheads since Jesus went back to heaven.

Kate says:

JM-
You’re exactly right. It is not a coincidence that I read all of these stories of abuse from PFM interns and they mirror the same behaviors I witnessed at the CC I attended for 20 years. Down to the same phrases Mike Rozell used. As a matter of fact, I have a friend that went in for marriage counseling with The Rozell’s when they visited our church several years ago . The pastor sat in on this “counseling session”and heard every word. Mike asked them same extremely inappropriate questions about masturbation. Calvary Chapel is where this started. If the head is sick, the whole body suffers. It’s hard to make any accusation against CC because they say the same thing Mike Rozell did. They’re the “Lord’s Annointed”. Sorry, but Calvary Chapel is a business. They have destroyed countless families and they will have to answer for that, the same as the business of PFM.

Charity Manwaring says:

I KNOW Pam is pure of ❤. MAYBE, disillusioned and scammed by Michael. But I KNOW HER HEART…AND IT IS PURE IN HIS NAME .?

Em says:

If the woman, Pam, described here is pure in heart, then she has serious mental problems…

Clear eyes full hearts says:

JM-
This is EXACTLY the way the Calvary Chapel I attended conducted themselves. One thing I would add on that post, though-
“Abusive churches, if presented with this very evidence, or any evidence to give credence to their abusive tendencies, will immediately attempt to discredit the author”

I saw time and time and time again the Calvary I attended wouldn’t listen to a second of a differing opinion as this would prove “persecution” from someone that had many “deep rooted” issues. Bitterness was/is often their supposed scapegoat. It’s truly maddening trying to talk to these people.

Anyone have any sort of advice for someone in communication with someone still attending that would refute any and all evidence as “persecution”?

Prayer is all I’ve got at this point. The Holy Spirit will figure them out.

Clear eyes full hearts says:

JM
Thanks for the response. I also have family members still very involved. In fact, it’s taken over every aspect of their lives. Any info you have on those that have studied this would be much appreciated.

Clear eyes full hearts says:

JM-
Thanks so much for the very interesting information. Can’t say I’m surprised at all. It’s truly astounding that people have such a wealth of knowledge about how corrupt it is, yet turn a blind eye to it. Thanks for the encouragement and I will pray for your family!

Anonymous says:

This seems very similar to that experienced by Pastor Chet Lowe, Patmos and those working under him at Calvary Chapel Fort Lauderdale. He had much respect for Potters Field and was a disciple of their ministry. We experienced the abuse, long work hours, mandatory volunteer time, using scripture to force “compliance”, trying to control our marriage/family, and then the excess control and crazy threats once we said we wanted to leave.

SFloridian says:

Wow
I remember the Rozells came to CCFTL and I bought a pitcher from them after their “ presentatio
A friend hosted a fundraiser for another friends daughter to attend potters field ministry. I believe it was 7,000.00. For what?
It made no sense to me to have to raise all
That.
She was to be there 6 weeks and then get sent out for a missions trip.
So many con artists under a guise of godliness!

Allison says:

I was a student at Potters Field Ranch in 2005 when Rozell wasn’t on site. I learned the Bible well there and believe they had good intentions, but I don’t agree with the way things were done and some things then were definitely harmful too. Harmful things include: not allowing us near 8 hours of sleep a night {especially if we stayed up & did our assignments}, punishing everyone if you get caught with your eyes closing during class, seemingly being shamed for not being Christian enough, and excessive workouts.

A leader mentioned that the school is set up to prepare anyone who might become a missionary overseas to be able to persevere through difficulties they may have to face. We were told the Holy Spirit will help us complete the physical activities that they expected of us during our workouts. That didn’t sit well with me because I don’t think it’s God’s intent for the Holy Spirit to be used for practice that way, nor did I know if God would allow it. A leader, I believe it was Pastor Chet, told me that they push us to our limits as much as the law will allow. We were told not to share what goes on at the school because it needs to be a surprise for future students. One time Pastor Chet forced me to continue the sprinting back and forth we were doing though I told him I couldn’t do it and sure enough I fell forward and scratched up my leg and he didn’t seem to think anything wrong with it except that I didn’t let Jesus do it through me. It seemed as though Pastor Chet was given ultimate authority by everyone as if he was considered Jesus. I wasn’t okay with that because he is only human so of course he will make mistakes. Once he was demeaning himself when he was next to me. That much authority is too much pressure to put on a person.. it’s unhealthy.

I have mild autism and hadn’t disclosed that possibility except to one leader but I felt as though Lowe disapproved of me because I didn’t express myself the same way as the others; it’s because I wasn’t able to. If I remember right he said I was judgmental in front of everyone and gave a lecture about pulling the stick out of my own eye. That really bothered me. I used to struggle with being judgmental when I was a child, but I had become a pretty understanding and compassionate person. I probably had a serious look on my face when I talked and since I am honest he must have decided that I’m judgmental. I couldn’t stand it when he shamed a student for getting divorced. The tone he used came across as though there’s no hope for her life. I told her “it’s okay” and if I remember right I was corrected and told that it’s not okay. I found out recently that one of my classmates had been saying bad things about PFR after her experience there. Another classmate had made their username PFR(Potters Field Ranch) survivor. Soon after our term had ended I had a crisis and needed a Christ follower to talk to. I called the school and talked to an intern who told me that I can’t tell her what’s wrong because I need to pray it out instead.

I believe that the lack of sleep among other treatment contributed to my adrenals being depleted to the point that 5 years later, when I was 26, I was told my adrenals were so gone my cortisol was completely used up. I had no energy, have to make sure I rest or I get sick, and I get catatonic. I no longer consider myself a Christian but rather as someone who is not convinced that I can trust God. It’s because of Christians treating people the way that we were treated there. I believe people should have rights and that no human should have ultimate authority.. and what about grace? That’s the essence of the gospel if I understand correctly. <3

Em says:

Allison, a sorrowful read. Power does ugly things to some people… I have seen it happen and confess i don’t understand it. I do recall the passage in our Bible where Jesus – God incarnate- refused to answer Herod. Omniscient, He knew the ruler deserved no respect.
We have a harder time discerning, but i am glad that Michael has the courage to expose these wolves….
It will help gping forward
May God restore your faith and keep you

Eric Schulken says:

Allison,
I am currently seeking answers to some issues that developed in my mind after attending potters field. I am almost certain that the neurologists will point to the same as you described in that my adrenal may have been significantly affected by the sleep deprivation tactics. The same tactics that our military use to extract information from captive enemies was enacted upon my class during a “learning experience” where we were to wrestle with God as Jacob. We were not allowed to sleep, eat, talk to another human being, or return to class until God had answered our prayer.
Since my graduation, I have continued to struggle with my walk with God. But this I knew before the potters field reconditioning experiment, God will never leave nor forsake me. He is God and there is no other.
Life is a struggle, but suffering is always optional. This was not true for those of us who endured the psychological assasination up on that mountain in Montana.
I hope that you are doing better and thank you for coming forward to share your story.

Allison says:

Wow Eric, I’m so sorry you went through that. I wish none of us had to experience that. That makes sense. It resembles a bit how people develop DID/multiple personality disorder, which allows others to get information out of the individual through their other personalities without their knowledge. I have had relationships with people who have the disorder.

Sorry it took me so long to reply. I just now saw your comment. I’m glad I wrote. Feel free to ask me questions.